Saturday, January 22, 2011

Can Fantasy Become Reality

Of late, I have gotten off track and have been spewing a great deal about our country's obsession with consumerism.  Back to some minimalism.

Lately my job has been taking me into some interesting homes filled with unusual and treasured items.  I stand back and witness the struggle people have with releasing the things that have been part of familiar surroundings.  It has forced me, over and over, to take stock of my own life and the tangible belongings that are part of it.

The title of this post deals with a fantasy.  Specifically, the one I have been having.  No, no...it has nothing to do with blondes or foreign beaches.  Actually, now that I think of it......  Aaaanyway, the fantasy I'm talking about involves the nearly complete release of all items cluttering up my life.  I imagine myself in a small, airy, modern, urban flat maybe 450 square feet or so.  I have only the necessities.  It is a comfortable little place and with me are a few carefully chosen items around that make me happy.  I have my laptop, a few books and perhaps a compact stereo that is easily hooked into my iPod or Pandora, my knife kit, cookbooks and some good pots and pans.  The rest are incidentals and not much more.  Most of life will revolve around experiences and not things.

As I glance around at my current life, one thing stares me in the face.  For many years I collected and restored antique clocks and timepieces.  Over time, I have amassed a significant collection. This isn't a hoarder type collection of anything and everything that has to do with clocks but rather, in my humble opinion, a nice aggregation of styles and types.  I took the time to refine the collection so that I had no duplicates and most of the items were genuine, unadulterated, antique originals.  They number nearly thirty in all and some are quite large and imposing.  Although all the clocks are scattered throughout the house, they still take up a lot of room.  There is no earthly way they could all be part of the minimalist fantasy.

I've been grappling all week with how many I should sell to scale back.  To me they're all attractive and many have long, interesting stories behind them, but when I moved to a smaller home some years ago, I was unable to set up my hobby and repair shop.  My new digs were simply too small and I now had a family that required my attention.  My equipment is now long gone and maintaining the collection mechanically is now much more difficult.  Now I understand the decisions that people must make after they've called on me to clear things out for them.  By picking up the phone, they have made a commitment to themselves to release material things.  Sometimes the decision is made for them due to monetary issues, other times it is simply a matter making life less weighty.  Folks in the latter category have a tougher time making decisions for obvious reasons, but when they do, I admire them for it.

I have reasons to keep them all, but I won't.  Which ones stay and which ones go?  I decided that the collection should be reduced by at least two thirds.  There's no particular reason for the mathematics here, just a desire to significantly cut back.  My decision is that I will pare back to ten or less, most of which will be smaller items that can fit together on a shelf or niche somewhere.  Because I see them every day, it is hard not to flip-flop on which to keep.  The solution was to somehow make my decisions final.  I grabbed a bunch of adhesive labels and told myself that once a decision was made to sell an item, it was to be marked with a label that would not be removed.  Of course I could change my mind, but a needed something symbolic that would keep me in line.  The labels would be fine.  I set to work.

As I stood in front of each clock, running through my history with it, it is easy to see how letting go can be hard.  Things have associations....some warmer or more personal than others.  When we make a conscious decision to let something go, we worry that we might lose or forget the association...the story that brought it to us in the first place.  Life is full of stories.  There will be plenty in the future that might revolve around other objects.  It doesn't mean I have to own them.

Long ago I was told that we never truly "own" old or historic items like antique clocks, we simply pay for the right to take care of them, to have them in our presence, to add to their collective history...then at some point, we pass them on to the next set of caretakers who will hopefully receive satisfaction and joy from them and preserve them until the next "owner" comes along.

It's time.  I've used twenty one labels.

It has been an honor to have cared for you and preserved your history.  I've received joy from your presence.  It is time for you to do the same for your next owner.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Manufactured Collectibility

It's the expression I use when I refer to anything manufactured and marketed with the implication that someday it will worth more than it was purchased for.

We've seen the ads, read the catch phrases and stared with dilated pupils at Certificates of Authenticity.

For more than a decade, I have fielded calls from excited prospects bubbling over about mom's cache of collector plates and dad's precious collection of Franklin Mint presidential medals plated in genuine 24 karat gold.  I'm obligated as a professional to tell them the truth.  The truth they don't want to hear about how they've fallen prey to slick marketing techniques and that their ship is not about to come in.

The scene replays itself over and over with minor changes in detail....  "Hello...my aunt passed away last month and she left me a complete set of pewter collector spoons she slowly purchased over 9 years.  Each month a new one was released and she purchased it so she could have the complete set.  They aren't made anymore and she has them all.  Each one is themed after a different movie star and many of those stars are now dead so the ones with dead stars on them must be worth more.  She kept the boxes and certificates with them.  I think each one was $39.95 when it was released and she has 108 of them with the little cabinet that holds them all.  I have no need for them and quite honestly my car has been acting up and I'd like to get a nice new car.  What do you think I can get for them?"

I take a deep breath and pull the standard response from my mental filing cabinet.  I start with the normal apology..."I'm sorry, but they really aren't worth very much.  A set like that might bring $40-60 at auction."

I wait.  Silence on the other end.  It's coming...I know it is.................................."For the whole SET?"

"Yes, for the whole set."

"But she paid thousands for them and she has them all.  None are missing.  I would consider taking half of what she paid since I really need the money."

My quick mental calculation indicates that this person is looking to net $2,000 for a set worth $60.

I wait a moment...the anger is coming next.  I try to explain... "I know she paid a lot for it, but there are thousands of collector spoon sets out there.  Everyone knows someone that has one.  Unfortunately, nobody is seeking them out and they aren't rare.  The company that sold them to her hooked her by saying they might be collectible.  They really aren't.  You won't get much for them."

"Sixty dollars......for the whole collection?!!  That's ridiculous.  That's probably what each one is worth now.  Are you marketing to the right people?  The real collectors must not be coming to your auctions.

The attempt at insulting me fails.  This person called me, not the other way around.  "I'm sorry, but I can't control demand for these sorts of things.  I'd love to get you two grand, but it won't happen...."  I close with another gratuitous apology and wonder how many additional phone calls will be made to consignment shops, jewelry stores and pawn shops before reality sets in.  It often feels like my job is to dash people's dreams.  Nobody wants to admit they were fooled.

Actually, I'm used to these exchanges it but it doesn't change the fact that such a large percentage of our population gets sucked into statements like "...bound to be an heirloom collectible...these are made in limited numbers so get yours today...comes with its own printed certificate and display box....a strict limit of three per buyer since we will break the mold after this production run...collect them all....this is an exclusive offering to collectors only, so call now....each one is clad in real sterling silver."

If I can save one person from the same fate as my typical imaginary caller, my time at the keyboard will be worth it.

Before I break it down, I'll offer a disclaimer.  There ARE some things that are manufactured to be collectible that actually are worth something.  Usually not a boatload, but something.  Some examples include coin sets from the US Mint (not from the Federal National Government Collectors Mint or the Franklin Mint....just the US Mint.  The one that makes our money.)  Some older Hummels have value (although those have come down, but Hummels date back to the '30's) and a few other things, but 99% of "collectibles" manufactured as such are not worth the material they are made of.

If you think about it, most of the valuable collectibles WEREN'T manufactured with that in mind.  Take the earliest Barbies.  Nobody knew in the 50's that Barbie would be so popular that she would still be around a half century later.  The first ones were just like any other new doll that comes onto the market.  It is only the fact that she became so popular that makes the earliest Barbies worth anything.  Of course the manufacturer capitalized on this by offering "collectible" Barbies decades later.  These were never intended to be played with, but rather something to accumulate numbers of for collectible value.  Most aren't worth more than a few dollars and aren't as rare as most people think they are.  Because the early Barbies were actually played with, few survived in good condition.  This is part of what makes them so rare and valuable.

Lets look at it from a marketer's point of view.  I have this great idea for a collectible.....Limited edition lighters with famous race car drivers embossed on them.  To sell them, I have to manufacture them first.  This takes a lot of money in designing, mock-up, tooling, image licensing and final manufacture plus advertising.  For something to be rare, there can't be an awful lot of them floating around, right?  But how can I make any money if I only sell a few before ceremoniously smashing the molds with a sledge hammer.  The answer is, I have to sell a lot of them!  To get around low numbers needed for true rarity, I use terms like "limited edition."  Can a run of 10,000,000 be a limited edition?  Of course it can.  Do I have to number each one with its exact number?  No.  I can put the number 3,205 on twenty of them if I want (as long as I distribute them widely.)  How can I imply desirability?  By including a Certificate of Authenticity.  This implies that people try to counterfeit these items, so be sure you're getting a real one and not some cheap fake.  I can paint a bunch of rocks gold and include a Certificate of Authenticity with each one stating that each is an original creation by me, clad in lustrous gold.  I'll have my sister sign the certificate and include a lovely collector box.  Do you see where I'm going with this?  Does any of it make my rocks valuable?  It's hype.

When I see the commercials on TV and the presentations for this crap on QVC, I want to hack.  I know somewhere there's a middle aged aunt or someone's father on a fixed income thinking "If I collect these and give them to my kids, they'll have something worth money down the road."  What they'll have is a bunch of metal discs stamped with someone's face on them.  Rest assured there will be thousands of other people with those worthless discs that cost them bunch of money as well.  Don't fall into the trap.

The next time you're sitting in front of the tube with a bag of chips and a commercial for gold plated commemorative stamps comes on and you see suited men removing a pile of them from a vault while telling you how valuable they will likely be, watch for the small print on the bottom of the screen and remember that if you stored your loose change in a vault, it wouldn't make it worth more than face value unless you could convince someone that it was SPECIAL change.

Spread the word.

We've got a million of 'em.  Now all we have to do is figure out how to get suckers....I mean collectors, to buy them.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Invented Days of (shopping) Importance

Well....it's over.  In looking back, here's my big observation.

Grandparents Day,  Father's Day, Black Friday and now Cyber Monday.  (Cue commercials for After-Christmas sales and New Years Doorbusters.)  There seems to be no limit to the invention of special days designed to coax us into spending money.  Although Father's Day and even Grandparent's Day are officially celebrated as days to recognize the loving members of our families, there's little doubt that those particular days are well supported and promoted by the retail community as days we need to show our love by purchasing crap.

If you love your father, you'll get him an iPod.  That's how we show our love, right?

Although, we knew the designation of Black Friday as the day when retailers finally turned a profit for the year (being in the "black") it had never taken on the significance that it currently has.  I used to work in retail and Black Friday was never the busiest shopping day from a revenue standpoint.  The final panicked days before Christmas blew Black Friday away when it came to how much was in the till.  It's different now.

People camp out in the freezing cold for a chance to snatch a fleeting bargain at 3AM.  If there was ever a carrot dangled in the faces of consumers, it is the prospect of saving $100 on a laptop if you come show your allegiance to consumerism by dragging yourself out of bed in the middle of the night and joining the worship at the local Best Buy Megachurch parking lot.  Bring your own Dunkin Donuts hot coffee.

As if being led around by our noses with all of this Black Friday bullshit wasn't enough, now there is a new shopping event.  Cyber Monday.  The name of the event itself brings thoughts of illicit activity like cyber-sex and cyber-crime.  Cyber Monday is the answer to those who don't buy into the middle-of-the-night shopping stampedes.  Now you don't even have to put your clothes on.  Just sit in front of the computer, scratch yourself and spend, spend, spend.  There's apparently no end to this nonsense.  I can only imagine what the next invented shopping day will be.  Update...there IS a new event!  Apparently "Free Shipping Thursday" has garnered enough attention to become an event all its own.  I'm anxiously awaiting the announcement of a long lost holiday of giving that is being resurrected from the folkways of some clandestine culture.  My guess is that it will fall some time between Memorial Day and Independence Day in order to even out the annual cash flow.  Mark my words.....

Not to be a curmudgeon, I'm for businesses being successful.  Heck I have my own business so I completely understand.  It's too much though.  Too much useless junk that gets tossed in a closet or re-gifted.  Too much emphasis on having, buying, upgrading.  What little happiness we get from the newly purchased usually fades before the packaging is out the door.

Last year I posted a note on Facebook about Black Friday.  People were getting killed in stampedes...they were dying under the feet of people who simply had to get the best deals.  That's the sort of thing that happens when people are trying to get out of a burning building that doesn't have enough exits, not in front of a Wal Mart that has toaster ovens on sale.  How did we get to the top of the food chain again?

The whole thing is exacerbated by the media who show video clips of women in stores, hair askew, breathing heavily exclaiming how much they "love the rush", "the pursuit of the bargain."  In the background, whizzing past are shoppers with carts stacked high with consumer electronics.  The scene is reminiscent of natural disaster stories where residents are looting...getting stuff for free.  I can't help but think the similarities are intentional.  During Black Friday, things are...well... practically free.....so get out there and loot.  All of it has become a well orchestrated herding of people and their credit cards to the check out aisle.

Are you freaking kidding me?  Who chooses this over sleeping in a warm bed?